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Some guys may have wrong ideas about abuse in relationships. For starters, abuse doesn't just mean hitting or shoving. Many other behaviors actually count as abuse, some of which may surprise you.

and you should take control," Ulloa says. Ignore them and be your own man. Sometimes knowing what's normal and what's unhealthy can be hard, Miller says. If you aren't sure how you should act, ask an adult you trust. A coach, teacher, your parents, or a friend's parent may be able to help you make the right choice. If a friend or classmate is verbally or physically abusing someone, look for a safe way to put a stop to the situation, Miller says. For example, start speaking to the abuser to create a distraction. Or let an adult know what's happening if it's not safe for you to get involved. If someone you like or love wants to stop seeing you, all the pleading, watching, and controlling in the world won't make this person yours, Gmez says.

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Steering Clear of Dating ViolenceHere's how you can make the right choices while dating to protect yourself from being either the source or the victim of dating violence.

These days, some teens may see abusive behaviors as normal. Recent research shows that young male athletes may notice abusive behaviors less over the course of a sports season, and feel less inclined to Nike Long Sleeve Womens speak up when they see abusive behaviors, Miller says. Jennifer Gmez says she was surprised how many teens of both genders thought it was OK for girls to hit guys.

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Also, both guys and girls can be abusive. And behaviors that many teens think are normal actually aren't cool at all.

And after the story involving singers Chris Brown and Rihanna hit the news a few years ago, Emilio Ulloa, PhD another dating violence expert noticed that plenty of high schoolers assumed that Rihannahad done something wrong. Teens he talked to said some of their friends "immediately asked questions about what Rihanna did to upset him, like 'What kind of women is she? Why did she disrespect him?'"

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Jennifer Gmez never forgot about her high school boyfriend after graduation. He haunted her in nightmares even after she moved away and changed her name. She says she would wake up with the memory of the abuse he inflicted on her fresh on her mind.

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If you're facing an immediate threat to your safety, you can call 911. If you see warning signs that you're being abused in a relationship in general, talk to an adult you trust, or, Miller says, try one of these web sites:

Jennifer is now studying to become a psychologist, and she's worked with teenaged girls to help them learn how to avoid abusive relationships.

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Sometimes teens pick up habits that they think are signs of love, but are actually controlling, like asking their girlfriends for their Facebook password. But jealous behaviors can start you on the path to physical types of abuse, Ulloa says. And, according to the CDC, people who think it's alright for their friends to engage in dating violence are much more likely to get involved in it themselves.

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Emotional abuse.

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A few years later, he tracked her down online. "We had a phone conversation," Gomez says. "He hadn't realized, for all these years, everything he'd done to me. He was living with the memory of the ideal us, how much he loved me. He didn't have the realization of him being this monster to me. He has to live with the fact that he's a monster in my eyes. I think that's probably very difficult."

Very common problems in teens include:

Dating Abuse, and Who's Doing It?About 9% of teens are the victim of physical violence from a dating partner each year, according to the CDC. But much of the abuse that goes on between teens may not be physical, says Elizabeth Miller, MD, PhD, a doctor at the University of Pittsburgh who focuses on teen dating violence.

in your email, you shouldn't do it in return. Your friends might tell you "put your woman in line, she shouldn't do that, Nike Jacket Black And Green

´╗┐Abusive Relationships and Teens

Get good practice. Even if you think you know what you're doing when it comes to these matters, the teen years are the time to learn the rules about dating. In some ways, you're getting practice for later relationships. "I think in some sense that this is the time when really good behaviors or bad behaviors can set in," Ulloa says. In some areas, crimes that are dating related come with an extra penalty, Gmez points out. For example, if you key a girlfriend's car, you could be looking at vandalism and additional teen relationship violence charges. Know your own boundaries, Miller says. If you feel like an action is wrong, don't do it no matter what. If someone you like hits you or snoops Nike Windrunner Blue And White

By recognizing abusive behavior, you can stay out of trouble, protect the people around you, and set yourself up to do well in the dating world later in life.

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But it's not hard to avoid bad behavior, whether you're dating, hooking up, or hanging out (and whether you consider yourself straight, gay, or any other category).

More from WebMD

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Abusive behavior between teenaged guys and girls is common these days, as Jennifer and several experts told WebMD.

Teens may do abusive things for many reasons. Some grow up in cultures that urge the men to be strong, which some guys confuse with being aggressive or controlling, says Ulloa, who researches dating violence at San Diego State University.

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